十二月的心情.

就這樣彈著.我不清楚是什麼和旋.我知道我想她了.但我們的世界很不一樣.和眼淚說好了不再見面.但是它時常在我不注意的時候就來拜訪.

我知道我很懦弱.讀書又讀的不好.

每倒了新的季節,會有某名的感觸.是人家畢業,失業的時候.是我嫉妒,羨慕的季節.我害怕.真的看不到未來的道路.我窩囊.放棄自己喜歡的女孩.什麼都以未來為前提.你要回去了.可能我再也見不到你了. 我知道我會後悔. 但我告訴自己我會努力的.學姐告訴我要勇往直前.但我害怕的是,我們再也不能像以前一樣的說話,一起的為譏笑對反而開心.那是一種遺憾.

眼淚忍住.想想回家就在一個月的時間.

十二月.就像學姐說的一樣,我開始嫉恨這個慶典的時段.明明就不習慣自己一個人的生活. 誰是真的能和我聊的天的人.

大家個忙個的.我只是一個遊子.把秘密藏在那已為我自己創造的8年保險箱裡. 再多的秘密也只有我知道. 我曾經告訴學妹.人是群體生物. 我們都必須依靠對方.我很失敗.我孤僻.我很羨慕別人的友情. 我對別人說的話 我卻自己沒能辦的到.

11.22pm 看到電話熒幕亮了. 我看到她的名字.和別人談話.但我選擇逃避.我真的不想面對. 不.是我害怕. 學姐.我對不起你.你叫我追她時.我真的害怕了.我退卻.

我還能見你幾次? 好了,膽小鬼. 快睡吧.一切都會在夢裡療傷的. 回到你最初那個有著偉大夢想的時候吧. 自由飛翔你喜歡的夢. 加油 黃俊卿.你行的.

讓愛再回到原點.

不久前,朋友提起這荒廢的地方.

常在想,我是否做了對的決定,住在這裡. 回家了一趟,感覺真的不一樣.家裡變了.兄弟長大,畢業的也差不多了.我後悔! 不是現在 而是過去.

可能這是一個過程.人生的過程,眼淚落下,是想家的淚,是思念的淚.我們不知道我們會面對怎麼樣的未來,但只求人生一路風順,

但,不管未來怎樣,我已準備好面對.生活再苦,還是叫生活.不是因為我不喜歡他就為你改變.

獨自守在空蕩的房間.吉他陪我度過.多希望一個懂我的人和我聊天.但音樂卻為我敘述我的心情.

不知是否我被音樂埋沒了,還是我想用音樂表達我的心聲.

92 days.

我選擇放棄她.因為我知道讓你難為難的事我做不出來. 想你的夜.

One step to near him

You will never know that even a light and simple sentence can change the another person whole life, words are powerful, it can be harmful to other sometimes, basically it always hurt people without you notice it. It is so powerful that you can cause an impact whether on a bad person or a good person.

A simple word,a simple sentence, it could be just "Hi, do you want to join us?" It can be just only that simple, that sentence will make the person have a 180 degree changed in him/her life.

I learned that, never shy to anything, try to be brave,try to speak out your feeling,it is really good when you are sharing your blessing from God to other people.

I had a lunch with my cell group members today,do you know that? It was a simple lunch, but it was not just as simple lunch as you thought. It was awesome. Jesus Christ told us a lot, how to influence people by using words,speak out loud ,act out.

That are lots of examples, the world is big,we just cannot imagine how big is it,as a human being, we human has been limited to do something,God gives us brain to think,eyes to see, ear to listen,and mouth to speak. That are the things that we can do,but we always afraid to do so.

2010 was good, it was awesome also,I used to attend church when I was young,like very young, I couldn't remember how young was it.

I always think of the challenge that pastors,cell leader has been given me, why do you accepts Jesus? and also, do you still remember the image when you first time meet the Jesus,and accepts him as your salvation?

Think of yourself,have you ever scold someone you don't like face to face? Yes, of course we do, sometime, it does hurt people a lot, on the other hand, have you ever think of what does the feeling of the person who got scold by you? When someone blame you the same word,the same sentence,will you feel uncomfortable ? Think of it, and challenge yourself.

World change every day,you change every day. God loves you because of God is,not because of anything you did or didn't do. Always remember, the best is yet come.

梦

无人的夜里

宁静的道路

有着小小风扇的伴随

红红的双眼

迟睡早起的习惯

热热的空气在屋里屋外进出

丝毫不把窗口当着一回事

填不饱的肚子

在肠胃里打着响鼓

长长的头发

只有夹子才能安抚它

长长的想念

是你无法理解的

每个人都有一个梦

梦不是和你想的一样

不一样的梦

有着不一样的路

你从来都不知

路

究竟有多长

究竟有多短

究竟有多危险

究竟有多安全

路

对某些人来说

是那么的明亮

是那么的光耀

但

有对某些人来说

是那么黑暗

让人抓不透

人生有多少个十年

人生有多少个二十 年

有人

有着全盘的打算

有着刚烈的决心

华人新年的到来

已不是那么的明显

不一样的国家

有着不一样的习俗

不一样的国家

有着不一样的庆典

生活在这里

是享受

还是折磨

都不是

这是一种磨练

逃避是一种对磨练的无声抗议

面子书上人们讨论的事

已不是我的话题

老朋友渐渐的没联络

新朋友渐渐的增加中

老与新

只在一线中

我的体会

相信是没人懂

羡慕朋友的至交

羡慕朋友的活动

考试的到来

带来的压力

经济的负担

这些都是磨练吧

人们倒数回家的行程

我却倒数考试的到来

不同的人格

不同的命运

人在深夜有着和早上大不同的情绪

对事物的要求

是求无止境

奢华的生活

不是我现在能过的

要风得风

要雨得雨

是迈向失败的第一步

重重的眼袋

像是承载着猜不透的重量

是时候

关上面子书

关上电脑

关上灯

进入只属于我自己的

梦

Thanksgivings!

This year,last year? The countdown was awesome,we were celebrate the new year by worship God. It is totally different from the previous years.

I believe that that are many ways to celebrate a new year coming,I had chose my way to celebrate it.

At the end of the 2010,I was keep thinking of what has God done to me,I really appreciate it.

The moment that I spend with cell members,I felt that celebrate new year in worship is really meaningful for all of us,we share about what happen to us in 2010.

2010 is a past,it means,anything bad which from 2010,we should throw it away,and have new start.

Honestly,for me, a new year doesn't means it is totally new for me,because I think every single day,when I wake up from sleep,open my eyes,it is a new year,a meaningful day for me.

That are lots of things waiting for me to facing,to challenge,to fight with them.

God always like to put some challenging stuff inside my every single pages,however,God also always give us a happy ending at the bottom of our pages.

The best is yet to come,it is a meaningful words, phrase for me,I will never forgot what God has taught us. Although I am facing any difficult problems,the best is waiting for me behind the huge number of problems.

Last 4 weeks,I will be in Kuching,with friends who haven't meet up for an age,can't wait to see them. I don't have a lots of friends in Kuching,it is a fact. Sometimes I was thinking it is all because of myself,should say,it is my fault actually.

I am a person who do not talk a lots, but it doesn't means I act cool. I want to communicate with other people,how I wish I got friend anyway.

I went to the church this morning,and we talk about thanksgiving again,and it was great that I learn thing again.

Thanks God for the relationship between my family,He brings me more closet to my family,building a new bridge,pull down the wall between my farther and I.Although I still trying hard.

Tomorrow school is going to reopen,I feel happy that I can learn something new again,but feel sad at the same time because of the holiday "mood"is still doesn't want to leave me aways.Hatesss.

So I really pray hard for the future thing that I will be facing! Thanks God!

New Trimester! =)

It has been a few months? I haven't update my blog,well... here I am!

I just got back from my 2nd hometown where is Kuching,a lovely place that I used to grow up. Don't get confused, my first hometown was Sibu,I was born in Sibu,so I am a sibu lan. LOL

Well... this home trip was quite fun,except for some parts, that is really really such a terrible in my life. Wish to forget about it, but seems it won't be true.=(

Okay,forget about the sad things, let's talk about the funny things,when first day I reached Kuching, there is only plenty of people know that I'm arriving at that day. Just because I want to surprise all my friends with a surprise way,like suddenly appear in front of them,so choose to keep the secret about my flight. Hmm... unfortunately,I was totally fail gao gao...haha!! The first day.. okay, I went to didi's house,and find them,when I reached there,there was no body there,and I try to go walked in the house and go upstairs to search for those guys. I still remember,didi's dog was still chasing me that time, luckily dog doesn't makes any sounds,otherwise my plan will be totally spoiled by just a DOG? LOL when I walked up the stairs,I didn't heard any sounds, I guess they might be going out at the moments,so I decided to go home first. Day one. Mission failed. LOL

Then the second day,I went to didi's house AGAIN! ,it was empty also! I'm like..what the hell, they supposed to be gather at here every night. So..I give up for searching them at the moments,I called them. -_____- haha! Such a funny things.

Wait wait,since I haven't taste the Kuching KAMPUA for half year,when I was in Kuching the second day,I called my neighbor who is WEI LIN PANDA came out for the first home trip breakfast, first meal was KAMPUA + TEH C PENG. SUPER ENJOY! =)

I was lucky,because one of the players (suak) was coming back to Kuching as well,so with him,I got chances for playing some games which is contain adventures .haha! So... after a few days discussion,we decided to have a paintball match! =) there were some people PAN SENG, so only got 8 people were actually playing.

This is what I get from the match...haha!

I didn't feel any pain when finished the round,but after I went back home,at the moment that I was having my shower,it felt sour,and itchy. haha!

This was the only activity that I done this time,but next time,it will be more! Please! =)

Nothing specials actually,we just hanging around, sitting at the coffee shop,and lim teh almost all the night, well.. obviously my sleeping hours has totally get influence by those "teenager peer" LOL Oh..I still remember,when the first night I got back Kuching, I can't even get used to the weather in Malaysia, so..I got flu. haha! Hmm... after such a long time I haven't been to Malaysia, the first impression that I think of Malaysia is, why is weather is super duper hot,Malaysia is super dirty ,and most importantly, WHY SO MANY LAKIA! haha!

Bad impression,right? haha! Well..I prefer weather in Australia,but food..hmmm lose chin chin... haha! Perth is getting hot now.. like almost 30 degree each morning. DEAD . -___-

I'm having my new semester now,but... the timetable shows me that I only got 1 week holiday when Christmas, noooooooooo.... I can't going back this time,so wait until next year! maybe? so worry about it. Please! =)

Tomorrow my class going to start,no more 10 am class, only got 8.30am classes, oh my goodness, need to wake up so early in the morning. Well.. the target of this year, get 70% and jump to the diploma!

Today I went to the church, and I learn something about making decision,you know what..the only place that I always cry is in church,I'm a person who has full of emotion. LOL quite funny,right?

Making a decision isn't a easy for us and you,God has always given us so much questions to deal,something I wonder, why? Why should him always give us to much trouble to face,and not giving guide us to settle it.

But,I was totally wrong, God is always be with use,why He is giving us so much trouble to deal with,is isn't a trouble,is a challenge,is an experience,God knows that we have to face those problems,and He has always guide us,it just matter do you accept the helps from God?

Be faithful,this is what I learned from church,ask him,ask in a faithful way,if you want to know what God really want you to do,ask him,and He will gladly tell you,He is always really to answer all the time.

We always need to face decision every day,even a small decision such as what to eat at the morning, what to wear for a new day. For me,a little decision does has impact rest of your life,it doesn't matter how small how tiny is the decision,even a small action will cause you regret. Today I know that,when I'm lost, I ADMIT that I need a guide,I ASK in faith for direction,I LISTEN for God's response,and I TRUST God when I don't understand.

Prov 3:5-6 NIV

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Amen.

Man Woman, Human Being?

I have been Perth for almost 4 months.

Things have changed,I did learn somethings new from here,the things that I never learn from my parent.
Sometimes,it's so sad to hear a bad news from my senior,I pray so hard for her.
Feels really sad,maybe God has choose the best way for her. I cried twice when I heard the news,she might no very closed with me, but we still had the best time in past time.,even that time I was young. You're always the best leader of the team.=) I know God takes you to a place that peaceful,away from the painful,away from afraid. Human born to be facing a lots problems that God has chosen for you. When the dead line is coming, God picks you back and stop letting you to face those problems. I know you enjoy and safe now,God always be with you. Amen. =)

I was watching people's blog. I feel like.. . Look,they are used to be playing around together now,but not. They hate each other,does that call hate? Maybe? Look at the picture that had taken, those are such a good memories for them. They had a good memory but they don't to keep it. Having a friend is better than having an enemy. In the past, I admit that I was hate somebody,but now,NO. Why people have to hate /dislikes each other? Although I feel many people don't like talk to me,I always give me a stupid excuse and tell myself, that is the truth why. I don't hate anybody,YES. I told myself,why I have to be a person who always hate each other,accept it is the best solution. I always chat with a person,I trust her just because my feel that,she doesn't have to tell other people what I had been told her. It's happy to have a friend like her. We have the same cogitation,we used to chatting by using phone. Since I came to Australia,we don't chat often as usually.I'm glad to have this friend,anyways.=) Thanks

Sometimes,I will take a look of my old albums or photos from the hardish,and you know what. I feel so touching when I saw those picture,because I know I got a lots friends,even they are no close with me. I appreciate it so much that God has given me lots of friends,and I tell God that I want more friends. MORE MORE. =) Friends is the most important part of my life now,I need it in the future,and of cause now. I met lots of friends in this university,and absorb lots of knowledge,and culture as well. As I had heard ,university "homework" is terrible,but life is good, we can choose our class whenever we want to.

Why I'm choosing Australia,there is due to my private reasons.haha but I can tell you,I never regret what I have choose. New life is really hard to settle down,there is no one to cook for you,help you to wash clothes,you have to decide what to do immediately. For me.. it's hard to deal with money. Really ! For sometimes, I really hate to make a decision between should or shouldn't buy it. I HATE THIS HABIT. However,there is some benefits for this habit.

If I have a magic lamp,I would have some wishes that really hope it will come true.
I hope my parents and my family will be healthy always, especially my farther,he has the Diabetes.
I hope all my friends are healthy as well,by the way,this must be no sick no disease!
I hope I can graduate with a good score.

I know that human can run away from the 生老病死. However, what I hope is healthy. For the last hope, I need to score it by myself, no only for hoping.

I wish for healthy, NO FOR RICH. =)
Love you all, to all friends at oversea. Study hard as well. For my junior, fight for UEC, never give up.

I'm proud to being a CHMS1 graduate student. =)

Man Woman, Human Being?

最近

开始想念玩钢琴了. 音乐,算是一种药吧,能治疗很多的病,音乐是一种发泄.
心情不好的时候,会想着皆由音乐来述说心情.
最近都带着耳机去学校,边走边想了很多.

在这里,朋友真的不多.可能因为没五个星期就会换一次班吧.
朋友就不固定,其他国的人就很多,很多年纪比我大的人,思想不一样吧.
中国人,不懂为什么,就每次看到不想读书的人都是中国人.
在玩电话.老师讲课给不想听.家人付钱给你们不是来玩电话的.

最近都喜欢呆在图书馆,就觉得图书馆才是一个能真真能让人认真的一个地方
在图书馆的时间也过的很快.

最近被presentation烦到..不知道怎么报告啊..
资料是有,整理起来是很乱..

为什么是双人presentation.烦....

这叫心情..

有时候..想到什么就做什么吧.
何必想到那么远呢??
一直被一种莫名其妙的感觉给拉着了,回头想想,为什么当初不要做呢?

我想改变着一点,我觉得我不是懒惰,而是不想去尝试.

加油!行的！=)

试着保持12小时的微笑.心情愉快!

很久没回来了

如标题，回来了，但不长久，心情不好 可能是烦大学事吧，今天早上做了个噩梦 噩梦中看到她，我也不知道为什么她会在里面。 总之是个噩梦就对了，也忘了，忘了也好。

想念学校了，想念学校的任何东西，高中也只有短短的六年，但在这六年来，我真的学到很多的动作，朋友我认识的很多，但真真真心的没有几各，放假大家各跑各的，其实我很想快点读书了，我知道读书的日子真的很少，想也知道，读书25年但做工要做个50年，为什么不把读书读好好来？快乐的学习，不是没个人都能有的，带着快乐的心态，这个应该更是少人有的，每个人，看到书，就怕，其实书跟不到你一辈子的，当你出社会时，可能你看文件比看书多，我拿开自己有买书的说，真的，读书，真的那么难吗？读书真的那么辛苦吗？知识学多了，对你自己是无害的。

2：17am 眼睛依然无法闭上，脑袋都想着别人去读书了，都开课了，每个人都为自己的梦想而冒险，而我还再靠家人供，我说过的话，我是会做到的，

2：22am 想着看着每个人都变了，变的haolian ，真的不喜欢，为什么一定要弄出自以为清高的样子，可能你认为我不适合做你的朋友，我不在乎！！以前的友谊可以象废物一样丢掉，我懂当时为什么她们要那么讨厌你了，可能她们早就看清你的真面目了，当时的我，真的很笨。

2：31am 找不到聊天的对象，能聊的，只是敷衍我的，问两句，答一句，朋友少到可怜

无言，今天写的就那么多，刚写到学校时，我流泪了，感触吧，出国了，我会想念你们的，爸妈！！兄弟们！！我爱你们

星期天

无聊...所以来写写
今天...离统考234天

3月...很多人生日...
都18咯！！
还在17=D

每天星期日都在家的...
想找点事做...
可是真的想不到要干嘛
没有去cycbe在之后
真的无聊死
难到一定要在cycbe,才能消耗时间?

我有一种幻想
就是每天精神的出门，
然后累累的回到家
想在学校度过，最后一年，
想到真的不是那么容易

有时真的羡慕那些电话一直响
有朋友找的人，说实在的，我应该去参加一些像
church 的东西，认识多一点朋友

高三
很多东西变了,要学的东西真的很多
时光不能倒流
想学什么就去学吧，
不要等到老了才来学
虽然说，活到老学到老
但老了还是差过现在
　所以呢，
想学，就去学
不要等到老的时候，才后悔

享受现在，不要活在过去
把过去埋在你脑袋的深处
等到成功，你就会忘了它，

想要等到很多东西
只有等到生日叫妈妈送了- -

一个人的才华再好，
品行不好，始终还是一个不好的人
口德，是很重要的,
想想，你在讲人的时候
翻过来想，如果那个人是你的时候
你会认为很受伤害
i serious ok?　= =

有时想想以前你是怎么说人，suan人的，
说真的，
我应该和那些人说对不起。
“对不起”

心里想到很多东西
想写，但怕写出来
怕有误会
心情低落＋想睡,
拜.

update 了，还蛮长的,
hehe

SHITTTTT 佛学会，活跃一点，HAHAHA
谁要一日游？最后一年来玩吧 XD
——————————END——————————

三個點"..."

兩個字，無言，我怎么會有一個這樣的朋友...
背后說人壞話
whatever...
算了...

XP

<各自远扬>

微风告知春天来访
纷纷绽放的花朵香气
令人想起远方的你
如春日阳光守护下绽放的花朵
未来 希望之光也会照耀我们吧
我们踏上各自的
各自抉择的道路

当初许下的约定
是我们心中描绘的
想像中未来的颜色
我们踏上各自的
各自抉择的道路
在未来的某日绽放笑脸
直到重逢时

それぞれに (各自远扬)

そよ风が告げる春の访れ
　咲き乱れる花の香りに
　远い君を思う
　春の阳に见守られて
　花が咲くように
　いつかは希望の阳が
　照らすでしょう

　それぞれにそれぞれの
　决めた道を歩き
　いつの日か微笑んで
　また会えるその时まで

　黄昏が告げる秋の访れ
　移り行く红の空に
　远い日々を思う
　
　秋の阳に见守られて
　実り成るように
　いつかは君の梦も
　叶うでしょう

　あの日交わした约束
　仆らが描いてた
　未来はどんな色に
　染まるのでしょう

聽下吧,不錯的一首歌～

離開

獨愛這張=)

星空是那么的美。。。但不是每次都看的到

雖然那只是幾天的聊話。。但當他要離開時。。其實真的還很不舍
那種感覺很奇怪..有種眼淚要出來的感覺== 看著他說再見。。雖然是戴著微笑。。 同時心情和言語上不是同一個感覺
人家都說笑很好。。其實哭和笑一樣。。 開心就笑。。不開心。。就哭出來吧
記得有次做夢。。我也忘了做什么夢了。。 我哭了出來。。說真的。。很想再回想那一次的夢
什么事情讓我哭了出啦。。
今天心情低落 想找人出來聊天。。但他們都有事做 對放假可以說又恨又喜歡。。 大家都有同感吧 考SPM的可以說每天補習。。加油啊！！！
雖然我沒考。。 也不懂要寫什么東東。。。去吹風去啦。。
一個無聊的晚上。。 誰住ＢＤＣ這里附近的啊==
我快悶爆了啦。。。

還有..我想找工作..可以介紹我嗎？@@

Holiday is Arrive...

i find those videos ... wahaha... very funny one...

see it !!!！！

Exam...

i forgot the password so i didn't logon to update the blog.. sorry =.=

lazy too.. =P

short post

it will be update soon when is final exams end... bla bla bla..

study study study and... study.... until sleepy..go sleep liao.. bye=.=

jia you all in you final exams...

omg.. we are going to senoir 3!!!! oh my god... so fast =_____=

6.08AM wakakakaka

now is holiday....but i wake up already... hahahaha...
later i will go swimming... play tennis,table tennis,badminton and 壁球...(i don't no how spell)... haha..
my mum was call me crazy just now... hehe...

hmm... i go melaka tomorrow morning... a bit happy and a bit sad... sad can't test the car in this holiday...wei lin test the car tuesday... so he'll take the license at the saturday.... i still need to wait one week.... haiz....

my friend is coming my house now.... just simple post something... haha =P
BYE~

something about today ... haha

ok... i update my blog now... so.. what thing i should need to write?? hmm...

i also don't no @@... just want to update... if not later got people keep telling me to update...

haha ...erm.. PC fair is coming... and food fair is coming tonight ....actually is yesteday night... haha..

tomorrow going to PC fair ...buy the new keyboard and something ... i also don't no still need buy

what ...then go buy my dad birthday present ... a belt @@ ... i don't no can buy

what thing to him already.... ok.. my brother is back on tuesday... and this mean i no car to drive

soon... haha ... -___-" 5pm learn car... i like the master(kelvin) today ...he no always ta my break...

the old master always say... add the gear slowly and carefully ... but the kelvin will say... put the

gear faster and "da li" LOL man!!! i add the gear to 5 today... speed already is 80++ haha....

ok.. i have my car test at 26th at this month...hope i will pass it !!!!

hmm.... nothing to write already.... hehe... go eat my watemelon -____-" bye bye~~

super man rertun?? lol my classmate edit a new name " BadMan" Return ... haha so lame~~=.=

yi zhong zhi xing

just want to tell... yi zhong zhi xing has change the date already...
change to 3/8/2008 ( sunday) but i don't no the time... tomorrow my class will got
a DJ(ah LONG) broadcast ... haha.. i think he will laugh when on the air...
haha...funny =D
our school is going have a qian ren yan one thousand omg !!! i want to see... LOL..
tomorrow the school door will close after the 2.00pm... then i got a question ...when rainning ... we can go where? hey man.... 1000+++ student stand at bus stop? can't believe lo... a boring post.. -____-"

and tell you guys... my english very poor one a ... test 10 time... i will fail 9 time... so don't complain my english... haha... POOR ENGLISH .... maybe is BROKEN ENGLISH... please fogive~~~ hehe